November 15th 2024.
It was a chilly night, and I was cozied up in bed with a bad cold. Suddenly, there was a knock on my door and I was surprised to see my date, with a bag of sweets and a movie in hand. He wanted to cheer me up, and I couldn't help but feel touched by his sweet gesture.
As we cuddled under the sheets, things started to heat up and before I knew it, we were both naked and about to have sex. I remember telling him to "put it in," but to my embarrassment, he whispered back that he was already inside me. I was shocked and didn't know what to do in that moment.
Being relatively inexperienced and with a fever from my cold, I hadn't immediately felt him. I felt terrible about it, but it wasn't intentional. We continued for a few minutes before randomly stopping, neither of us having an orgasm. We didn't discuss what happened, but I made sure to cuddle with him afterwards to reassure him.
Despite my efforts, we never saw each other again. Looking back, I sometimes wonder if I should have apologized, but I also know that there wasn't much teenage me could have said to make him feel better. After all, when it comes to sex, we're all just trying to figure things out.
I'm sure many of us have had moments where we've done or said something stupid in the bedroom. I know I certainly have. It's part of the human experience, especially when two people get naked and start grinding on each other. Sometimes, things don't go as planned and we end up in awkward or embarrassing situations.
But what's important is not to shame ourselves for these "f*ck-ups." The real issue is not talking about them, which can lead to feelings of shame and hinder our ability to fully enjoy our sex lives. So, in the spirit of openness and honesty, I'm sharing some of my most mortifying sexual experiences.
There was the time I accidentally insulted a man's penis in the worst way possible. And then there was the time when my period arrived during a heated hookup and we didn't notice until the morning. I was so embarrassed and wanted the ground to swallow me up, but my partner never said a word about it. In fact, we ended up having sex again a few weeks later.
And most recently, in my 30s, I had a moment of drunken passion where I accidentally blurted out "I love it, I love you" during sex. It was in the heat of the moment and I didn't know what to do. Thankfully, my date also said something similar, and we both laughed it off the next day.
These are just a few examples of the many times I've messed up in the bedroom. But I've learned to not take it too seriously and to remember that we're all just human. We're all bound to make mistakes, but it's important to not let them define us or hinder our enjoyment of sex.
So, next time you find yourself in an awkward or embarrassing situation during sex, just remember: we're all idiots and everything will be okay. And if you ever need a good laugh or reminder that you're not alone, just read my stories. Trust me, they're pretty embarrassing.
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