When people insult me with this term, I only feel sorry for them.

I often receive the hurtful insult that I am just a "man in a dress" or someone who experiences "autogynephilia." These terms may not be familiar to most people, but for someone like me who is transgender, they are all too common and eye-roll inducing. Autogynephilia, or AGP, was originally coined by sexologist Ray Blanchard to describe a male person who is aroused by the idea of themselves as a female. However, this term has been criticized for not meeting modern scientific standards and is not used by any medical professionals who provide gender affirming care.

Instead, I see it frequently used as an insult by those who wish to demonize or humiliate trans individuals. It's just another way for people to make wild and ignorant claims about our lives and identities. They reduce our complex and personal journeys to a simple sexual fetish or deception. It's hurtful and untrue.

In reality, transitioning has nothing to do with sexual gratification for most trans individuals. For me, it was about finding peace and happiness in my own skin. Being perceived and treated as a man in society was deeply distressing for me. I never felt comfortable with the expectations and labels placed upon me. Transitioning allowed me to express my true self and brought me joy and fulfillment. It was the best decision I've ever made.

But unfortunately, trans people are constantly demonized and reduced to harmful stereotypes by society. I have been called a predator, pedophile, and fetishist, all because of my gender identity. These accusations are baseless and hurtful, and they only serve to further perpetuate harmful myths about trans individuals.

It's clear that those who attack and insult us have no understanding of the trans experience. They make assumptions and judgments without ever bothering to get to know us as individuals. If they did, they would see that we are just like everyone else, trying to live our lives authentically and with dignity. We should all be able to express ourselves in whatever way makes us happy, without fear of judgment or ridicule.

So, to those who continue to use terms like autogynephilia or "men in dresses" to attack trans people, I urge you to educate yourselves and listen to our stories. We are not the enemy. We are your friends, family members, and neighbors, trying to live our lives to the fullest. Let's move past ignorance and fear and embrace diversity and understanding instead.

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