PHILOSOPHER: Why is it necessary to be special? Probably because one cannot accept one’s normal self. And it is precisely for this reason that when being especially good becomes a lost cause, one makes the huge leap to being especially bad—the opposite extreme.
But is being normal, being ordinary, really such a bad thing? Is it something inferior? Or, in truth, isn’t everybody normal? It is necessary to think this through to its logical conclusion.
YOUTH: So are you saying that I should be normal?
PHILOSOPHER: Self-acceptance is the vital first step. If you are able to possess the courage to be normal, your way of looking at the world will change dramatically.
YOUTH: But …
PHILOSOPHER: You are probably rejecting normality because you equate being normal with being incapable. Being normal is not being incapable. One does not need to flaunt one’s superiority.
——-
This was an interesting exchange from “The Courage to be Disliked” in the context of parenting. It got me reflecting on dysfunctional behaviors I’ve observed in youth sports – both from others and myself.
I remember the first time I was introduced to competitive sports as a parent. I felt just as involved in my child’s performance. A normal day in the sun wasn’t good enough.
I realized soon enough that my mindset (which admittedly lasted for the best part of a year) was robbing all the joy out of the activity. At the heart of that dysfunctional attitude was the absence of self-acceptance and a clear “separation of tasks.”
I see it now and understand it better.
