June 23rd 2024.
As I reflect on my journey, one memory that will always stand out to me is the feeling of pride I had in representing my community as an openly transgender man. It was a defining moment for me, as I had been making noise and standing up for myself since I was a child. And now, that noise had transformed into rhythm, songs, and a passion that kept me alive.
Growing up as a child who didn't fit into traditional gender norms, the stage became my sanctuary where I could truly express myself. I looked up to artists like David Bowie, who also embraced their uniqueness and inspired me to do the same. As I performed and wrote songs, I often found myself singing about my secret crushes on girls in school. But there was one song, "Miss Conception," that was about something deeper – my own identity and the feeling of being trapped inside someone else's skin.
Through the years, I released music under different stage names, but it was under the name Lots Holloway that I found success with a string of hit singles. However, in 2020, my life came to a halt. Not only were we in the midst of a pandemic, which meant I couldn't perform and make money, but I also realized that I could no longer continue living as the person I was pretending to be.
Since the age of 15, I had struggled to accept myself and had forced myself to become someone I thought others wanted me to be. I had created a character with a charming smile and a confident persona, and for a while, I believed I could live that lie forever. But at 27, I came out as a transgender man to my family, friends, and fans. It was a scary and liberating moment, but I was also worried about how hormone replacement therapy (HRT) and taking testosterone would affect my singing voice.
As I began my transition, I stepped away from social media and kept it private. I was afraid that my voice, which had been my source of acceptance and validation, would change. And it did – my vocal range became smaller, and I struggled to hit notes in the same key. Despite the support from those around me, I feared that the one place I felt accepted would be taken away from me.
But through music, I found the strength to fight for myself and the life I deserved. After four years and a drop of an entire octave, I reemerged as Dylan Holloway, also known as Dylan and the Moon. In 2022, I made a comeback with a headline show and a new version of my old song, "Heaven Now," which featured my old voice as a backing singer. I had initially wanted to leave behind my past as Lots, but in my transition, I realized that she was the one who brought me to where I am today – a strong, brave, resilient, and kind person. I couldn't lock her away.
Moving forward, I have plans to collaborate with my past self and create more artistic works that reflect my journey. As I continue to grow and evolve, I am grateful for my music, which has been a source of strength and inspiration. And I will never forget the pride I felt as I represented my community and myself as an openly transgender man.
I will always remember the overwhelming sense of pride that came with being a representative for my community as an openly transgender man. My journey to self-discovery began at a young age and I have been making noise ever since. What started as mere noise, slowly transformed into a rhythm, and before I knew it, I was writing songs that kept me alive.
As a child, I struggled to understand my true identity - a boy trapped in a girl's body. But when I stepped on stage to sing, I finally felt free to express myself. Looking up to icons like David Bowie, I found solace in being different, as long as I had music by my side. In the early days, my songs were about secret crushes on girls from school. However, there was one song that was a reflection of my true self - 'Miss Conception' with the lyrics, "I wonder if you know when you were looking at her, you were also looking at me". It was a song about my identity and the feeling of being trapped in someone else's skin.
Despite releasing music under different stage names, I found my true identity under the name Lots Holloway. From 2017-2019, I was fortunate enough to have successful singles. But in 2020, my life came to a standstill. The pandemic not only meant I couldn't perform and make a living, but it also gave me the opportunity to reflect on my life. It was then that I realized I could no longer live as the person I was pretending to be.
From the age of 15, I struggled to accept myself and felt the need to become someone else, someone I believed everyone wanted me to be. I created a character with a charming smile and an inflated ego, and for a while, I convinced myself that I could live that lie forever. But at 27, I came out publicly as a transgender man to my family, friends, and fans. I then took a step back from social media and began my transition in private, afraid that taking testosterone as part of hormone replacement therapy would affect my singing voice - and it did.
The thought of losing my singing voice, the one place where I felt truly accepted, terrified me. But through music, I found the strength to fight for my true self and the life I deserved. After four years and a significant drop in my vocal range, I am now known as Dylan Holloway, or as I like to call myself, Dylan and the Moon.
In 2022, I made a comeback with a bang, announcing a headline show and releasing a new version of my old song, 'Heaven Now', with my old voice as a backing singer. At one point, I wanted to leave Dylan behind and start a new life, but during my transition, I realized that 'Lots' was the strong, courageous, resilient, and kind individual who led me to where I am today. I couldn't lock that person away.
Moving forward, I have plans to collaborate with my past self, creating more artistic projects that showcase the journey of Dylan and Lots. Through music, I have found the courage to embrace my true identity and live a life that I truly deserve.
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