July 2nd 2023.
Dear Sharon,
Congratulations on your engagement! Planning a wedding can be an exciting yet stressful experience, and I am sorry to hear that your mental health is being affected, particularly relating to your body image.
The pressure surrounding weddings and body image can be overwhelming, and it is essential to remember that you are beautiful just the way you are. Brides come in all shapes and sizes, and each one is unique and beautiful in her own way. There is no one-size-fits-all definition of beauty, and your worth as a bride is not determined by your size or appearance but by the love and joy you bring to your wedding day.
Regarding practical matters like dress shopping, I advise seeking out boutiques and designers who embrace body positivity and inclusivity. Look for places that offer a wide range of sizes and create a welcoming atmosphere for all brides. You have the right to ask questions of the shops, such as whether they have individual changing rooms, which will make your experience more comfortable, and whether they have worked with curvy brides before.
It might be worth you going to do your first dress shopping alone. Decide what you like, what you feel comfortable and beautiful in, before friends and family can have a say. Remember, wedding dress sizes are often very different to what you’d get off the rack, so try not to put too much onus on what a label says. Alternatively, you could hire the services of a couture seamstress and pattern designer to make a dress to suit your body type.
Doing your shopping online is also an option. You can order and return dresses, opt for something less traditional, and this method gives you more time to decide on what you want.
Regarding online platforms like wedding forums, try and disengage from conversations focusing solely on dieting and weight loss. Instead, seek supportive communities that prioritise body positivity and celebrate all brides. Surround yourself with like-minded individuals who share your values and can provide a positive influence during this special time in your life.
Have you had friends and family comment on your weight? It is essential to establish clear boundaries and communicate your needs effectively. Let your loved ones know you appreciate their input, but you prefer to focus on other aspects of your wedding journey rather than weight loss. Redirect the conversations towards topics that bring you joy and excitement.
I hope these suggestions guide you in navigating this part of your wedding planning. Always remember that you deserve to feel happy and loved throughout the process, and your partner loves you for the person you are with your unique qualities and values. What brings you together as a couple is not superficial.
Focus on finding a dress that makes you feel beautiful and confident, honouring your body shape as it is. I wish you a joyful, memorable wedding day with love and positivity.
Best wishes,
Alison
Do you have a wedding problem you need some advice on? Alison Rios McCrone, who has run a wedding venue for 10 years and helps couples plan weddings, is here to offer a helping hand. Email email to share your issue anonymously with Alison and get it solved.
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