When I talk to new parents, I give just one piece of advice: Keep extremely low expectations – and let life exceed them.
I don’t share tactical advice because every parent figures out the tactics over time. That’s not the hard part. The real challenge is managing your mindset – living through the inevitable ups and downs, and sitting with the discomfort of losing the control you once had.
It’s tempting to over-optimize: the nap schedule, the sleep routine, every regression or phase. But the truth is, babies are doing a tremendous amount just by growing and making sense of the world.
Routines will come with time. Consistency definitely helps and can be a high probability strategy for many kids. But outcomes won’t always match the plan.
And that’s okay.
No eight-year-old struggles forever with sleep or with getting to the bathroom to take a poop. These things work out in time.
The reason I love lowering expectations is because it reminds us to let go a little, stay consistent where it helps, and – most of all – calm down.
