How to ensure your parents' safety at a nursing home during holiday visits.

During my college years, I was fortunate enough to have friends who were much older than the average student. Despite the significant age gap, we spent many nights and weekends together for a period of three years. I was working a physically demanding job at the time, making a mere $4.25 an hour. But the connections I made with the residents and staff at the elder-care facility where I worked made it all worth it.

Twenty years later, my mother moved in with me and made a surprising request. She asked me to put her in a nursing home when the time came. I immediately rejected the idea, knowing that even the best facilities have their flaws and things can go wrong. Not everyone has the luxury of being able to stay at home with their family, so it made me wonder what options were available for those who needed long-term care. Based on my own experiences, I always advised people to look for non-profit facilities, particularly those run by organizations like churches. These facilities often have a strong sense of community involvement and rely on volunteers, which can make a big difference in the quality of care provided.

As we enter the holiday season, I can't help but think about the seniors who are living in long-term care facilities. It's a time when we should all come together to help those in need. This is especially true for my own mother, who had a scary experience when she went to a temporary rehab center after her second hip replacement. I visited her daily and quickly realized that this was not the right place for her. She couldn't remember where she was or why she was there. It was clear that she wasn't receiving the proper therapy or care, and they even told me she had dementia. They showed me a test she had failed, where she was asked to draw a clock.

This was a devastating blow, as my mother had always been of sound mind prior to her surgery. However, due to complications with the anesthesia, she was unable to start her physical rehab immediately. The hospital arranged for her to go to a rehab center, and I didn't think to check it out beforehand. I assumed that if the hospital was sending her there, it must be a good facility. I was wrong. After only a week, I went to the administration offices and asked to see her chart. I was shocked to see that they were giving her medications that were not a part of her regular regimen. I knew I had to take her home.

During her stay, they had not changed her bedding, helped her bathe, or provided any physical therapy. This experience made me appreciate even more the non-profit facility I had worked at during college. We had dedicated volunteers, a strong focus on resident care, and a great work ethic among the staff. When the nursing administrator asked me if I thought I could take better care of my mother at home, I didn't hesitate to respond with a resounding yes.

When I shared this story with Tamika Atkins, the administrator of the non-profit Health Care Center at Franklin Park in Denver, she informed me that some facilities use drugs as restraints, a practice known as "snowing." This was a shocking revelation and made me think about all the residents who may not have family members visiting them to advocate for their well-being.

It's clear that there is a stark difference between the profit-driven approach of some facilities and the caring approach of non-profit organizations. It's important for us to support and advocate for facilities that prioritize the well-being of their residents over their own financial gain. As we enter the holiday season, let's remember to think about our seniors living in long-term care and find ways to help and support them.
During my time in college, the majority of my friends were around the age of 88. It may seem like an unconventional group to befriend, but I had the unique opportunity to work at an elder-care facility during my nights and weekends. Despite the physically demanding nature of my job and the meager pay of $4.25 an hour, I cherished the connections I made with both the residents and staff.

Now, over 20 years later, my mother has moved in with me and she recently made a request that struck a chord with me. She told me, "When the time comes, I want you to put me in a nursing home." My response was a resounding "never." Having witnessed the challenges and potential issues within even the best facilities, I couldn't fathom the thought of leaving my loved ones in the hands of strangers.

Unfortunately, not everyone has the option to care for their family members at home, so what can we do to ensure they receive the best possible care? As someone who has experienced this firsthand, my advice is to seek out non-profit facilities, particularly those run by organizations such as churches, with strong community involvement and dedicated volunteers.

As we enter the holiday season, I can't help but think of the seniors living in long-term care facilities. It's a scary and uncertain time for them, as I learned when my mother went to a temporary rehab center after her second hip replacement. I visited her daily, sometimes twice a day, and it quickly became apparent that I needed to get her out of there. She was disoriented, unable to remember where she was or why she was there, and receiving minimal care and therapy. It was a shock to see how drastically her condition had deteriorated in such a short amount of time.

Prior to her surgery, my mother was sharp and had no signs of dementia. However, due to complications with the anesthesia, her physical rehab was delayed and the hospital arranged for her to go to a rehab center. I didn't think to research the facility beforehand, assuming the hospital would have chosen a reputable one. I was wrong. After a week, I took matters into my own hands and brought my mother home. It was a stark contrast to the non-profit facility I had worked at in college, with its dedicated volunteers, attentive staff, and strong work ethic.

When I confronted the nursing administrator about the inadequate care my mother had received, her response was callous and dismissive. It was clear that profit was their main priority, even if it meant sacrificing the well-being of their residents. This experience only further solidified my belief that non-profit facilities are the way to go.

I shared this story with Tamika Atkins, the administrator of the non-profit Health Care Center at Franklin Park in Denver, and she confirmed my suspicions about some facilities using drugs as restraints. It's a disturbing practice known as "snowing," and it's often used on residents who may not have any family or visitors to advocate for them.

As we navigate the complex and often overwhelming world of long-term care for our loved ones, it's important to remember the importance of a caring and compassionate approach, rather than just focusing on profit margins. Let's make a conscious effort to support non-profit facilities and ensure our seniors receive the best possible care. After all, they deserve nothing less.

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