Couples trying to conceive finding it awkward to plan sex.

Don't use lube or saliva as they can slow down sperm.

October 20th 2023.

Couples trying to conceive finding it awkward to plan sex.
This week, we're hearing from Jenny*, a 35-year-old heterosexual woman. Jenny and her husband are trying to conceive, which she describes as "quite a strange experience".

"Sex is concentrated on every day for almost a week, and then rarely outside of that," she adds.

"When I was younger I felt far more confident, particularly about my body, and loved the idea of an evening ending in sex. In my 30s, I’ve noticed so many changes in my body and mental health, and sex feels higher stakes. Although I always enjoy it at the time, I find I sometimes need to build up the courage to get going."

Jenny would like her sex life to be a bit more spontaneous and frequent, but she still orgasms every time. Here's how she got on this week...

Sunday

Jenny has been using an app to track her ovulation, and it's potentially the first day of her fertile period. To make it a shared job, she sends her partner a screenshot and reminds him.

Later that night, she joins him in bed and they have a cuddle and some foreplay. Jenny is aware of the tension and makes jokes to try and break the ice. After, they agree not to leave it until the end of the day tomorrow.

Monday

Jenny wakes up feeling anxious, and her dinner with friends doesn't help. After they leave, and her app says she's unlikely to ovulate until Thursday, they take a break.

Tuesday

Jenny exercises in the morning, goes for a swim, and then heads to a comedy event. When she gets home, she takes the lead in bed. Despite the advice to not use lube or saliva, she enjoys going down on her partner and the sex afterwards is fun.

Wednesday

Jenny wakes up feeling anxious again, and they cuddle but don't have sex. Later that day, they meet family and have dinner, though Jenny still doesn't feel like being intimate.

However, as it's potentially ovulation day, they make the most of it.

Thursday

Jenny and her partner go to the doctor to discuss fertility tests and get reassurance that they're doing the right things. After this, they have sex and her partner goes longer than ever before.

Afterwards, Jenny finds herself wondering if that was it - did they just make their baby? She lies still for a minute or so before having to pee.

Friday

Jenny feels much more relaxed on a Friday, and they go to shul and then to a cinema, though the cold weather means they don't feel like being intimate.

Saturday

Jenny goes to an early yoga class and then starts a manic kitchen clean. By the time she's done, her partner is already asleep, so no sex tonight. Instead, they watch War of the Worlds.

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