March 31st 2024.
Rae had been feeling insecure about her boyfriend's constant request to perform oral sex on her. She finally gave in and allowed him to try, but he only took a few licks before giving up and using his fingers to "finish her off". This left Rae feeling disappointed and self-conscious, especially since he didn't say anything about it afterwards.
Feeling uncertain and seeking some advice, Rae turned to Reddit and shared her awkward experience. She explained that her boyfriend had never done it before and was really excited about it, but she was insecure and hesitant. She finally gave in, but it didn't go as well as she had hoped.
After her boyfriend stopped, he didn't say anything and just used his fingers instead. Rae couldn't help but jump to conclusions and assume that she didn't taste good. She even tried eating pineapple beforehand, as she had heard it could make one taste sweeter, but there was no scientific proof to back that up.
Rae's experience is not uncommon, as many people feel self-conscious and vulnerable during oral sex. Dr. Limor Gottleib, a sex expert, explains that facing rejection from a partner can be unsettling and cause doubts about one's desirability. However, she also emphasizes the importance of open communication and understanding each other's perspectives to improve the experience.
Research has shown that societal expectations and pressure to perform contribute to people internalizing these insecurities. Dr. Limor's advice for women, especially young women, is to build their confidence and sexual self-efficacy. This includes being able to say "no" to unwanted experiences and expressing one's desires in a relationship.
Interestingly, research has also shown that men tend to report more positive sexual experiences and increased sexual desire regardless of women's genital aesthetics. So, in Rae's case, it may just be that her boyfriend isn't yet confident in performing oral sex.
Dr. Limor's main tip for women in Rae's position is to make oral sex about themselves. She advises against internalizing insecurities and instead focusing on what feels good for them. Good genital hygiene is also crucial, and any strong odors may be a sign of an underlying health issue that should be addressed.
To enhance the experience, Dr. Limor suggests using breathwork and involving other body parts for simultaneous stimulation. Open communication and providing feedback to the partner are also important for a more enjoyable experience. If taste is a concern, flavored lube can be used, and Kegel exercises can be done during orgasm to intensify the experience.
Overall, Dr. Limor encourages people to talk about their sexual experiences and desires openly, as it can lead to a deeper connection with their partner. So, instead of feeling ashamed or embarrassed, embrace the opportunity for communication and exploration to make sex even more enjoyable.
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