After my husband's alcoholism took him, I'm reclaiming the part of myself that was lost.

I changed my life by embracing a self-care lifestyle.

May 18th 2024.

After my husband's alcoholism took him, I'm reclaiming the part of myself that was lost.
On a beautiful summer day in 1999, Kim and Chris Moore exchanged vows and began their journey as husband and wife. They had a love story that could be described as a whirlwind fairytale romance, according to Kim, who is now 53 years old. Despite their different backgrounds - Kim being Canadian and Chris a London-based risk analyst - fate brought them together through work. It was in the late 90s when Chris flew out to their company's office in Calgary, and that's when their paths crossed.

Kim fondly recalls their first meeting in August of 1997. They went out to dinner and spent the next day together, getting to know each other. When Chris returned home, they continued to stay in touch through letters. He would even send her thoughtful gifts like books and flowers, but it was the day he sent her a plane ticket to visit him that truly swept her off her feet. She packed her bags and spent two weeks with Chris in November of 1997, and by the end of the trip, they were engaged.

After the proposal, Kim made the big move from Canada to the UK, and the couple settled down in Colchester, Essex. She arrived in February of 1998 with all her belongings in an old-fashioned trunk, but she was welcomed with open arms by Chris and his family. They made the transition easy for her, and she felt loved and cared for. It was a beautiful start to their journey as a married couple.

In July of 1999, Kim and Chris tied the knot, and their love only grew stronger from there. They were blessed with two children, Hugh and Ella, who are now 22 and 17 years old, respectively. Before becoming parents, Kim and Chris enjoyed their social life, going out to dinner parties and spending time with friends. However, alcohol was often present during these gatherings.

It wasn't until after the birth of their first child, Hugh, that Kim noticed a change in Chris's behavior. She would find little vodka bottles around the house, but she never spoke up about it. She didn't know what alcoholism looked like or how to address it. Over time, she started to notice that Chris would have a drink in the morning before going to work, and when she expressed her concern, he would get defensive and say hurtful things. Kim stopped talking about it, thinking that loving someone meant accepting them as they are.

In 2010, Chris didn't come home one day, and Kim received a call from a hospital in London. He had been admitted overnight but had left without receiving any treatment. This event marked the beginning of a downward spiral for Chris, and their lives were thrown into chaos. Kim didn't know who to turn to or how to get help, as alcoholism and substance misuse were not openly discussed 14 years ago.

Living in constant anxiety and worry, Kim struggled to come to terms with the situation and felt like she was dealing with it alone. She didn't want to get Chris in trouble or cause any harm, so she kept quiet. Meanwhile, at home, Chris was distant and absent, causing a strain on their family life. It was a difficult time for Kim, and she eventually asked for a divorce in 2011, after witnessing and supporting Chris through multiple seizures and injuries.

Their children, Hugh and Ella, had a loving father, but he was often absent due to his drinking and health issues. It was a challenging time for the family, and even though Kim tried her best to protect her children, she couldn't always provide them with the emotional support they needed. After five rehab attempts, Chris tragically passed away on May 15th, 2017.

Kim had shouldered the burden of taking care of Chris and raising their children, and it took a toll on her own well-being. Even after his death, she found it challenging to prioritize herself. Her focus had always been on protecting her children, and she didn't realize how exhausted and emotionally drained she was until everything came to a halt. She struggled with anxiety and anger, often lashing out without realizing it. It was a tough journey, but Kim found strength and resilience in herself, and she continues to be an inspiration to others who may be going through a similar experience.
On their wedding day, July 3rd 1999, Kim and Chris Moore had no idea what their future would hold. They were caught up in the excitement and love of a whirlwind fairytale romance.

Kim, a Canadian, and Chris, a London-based risk analyst, had met through work in the late-Nineties when Chris flew out to their company's Calgary office. It was August 1997 when they were first introduced, and they immediately hit it off. After a dinner date and spending time together the next day, Chris had to return home. But that didn't stop them from staying in touch through letters, flowers, and books sent through the mail. And then, in November 1997, Chris surprised Kim with a plane ticket to visit him. It was during this two-week trip that they got engaged.

After the proposal, Kim took a leap of faith and relocated to the UK to start a new life with Chris in Colchester, Essex. She arrived in February 1998 with only an old-fashioned trunk of her possessions, but she was warmly welcomed by Chris and his family. It was a beautiful transition and she felt loved and cared for.

The couple got married in July 1999 and soon after, they welcomed two children: Hugh, now 22, and Ella, now 17. But as they settled into their new life, Kim started to notice that drinking was becoming a problem for Chris. They used to enjoy socializing and going out for dinner parties, but now alcohol seemed to be a constant presence. Kim tried to address it by leaving out little vodka bottles she found, but Chris would get defensive and say hurtful things like, "If you loved me, you wouldn't say things like that." Kim didn't know what alcoholism looked like at the time, and she didn't know who to turn to for help.

In 2010, Chris didn't come home one day and Kim received a call from a hospital saying he had been there overnight but had left. This was the beginning of a downward spiral for Chris and their family. Kim felt like she was alone in dealing with the problem as there wasn't much discussion about alcoholism back then. She didn't want to get Chris in trouble or hurt his career, so she didn't know how to handle the situation.

As the chaos and trauma continued to escalate, Kim asked for a divorce in 2011. She witnessed and supported Chris through multiple seizures and injuries caused by his drinking. It was a difficult decision, but she knew it was best for her and their children. Unfortunately, Chris passed away in 2017 after being admitted to rehab five times. The burden of taking care of Chris and their children had taken a toll on Kim's own well-being, and it was a struggle for her to prioritize herself even after his death.

Looking back on their whirlwind romance, Kim can see the warning signs of Chris's alcoholism. But at the time, she didn't know what to do or who to turn to. She hopes that by sharing her story, others will realize the importance of seeking help and support for themselves and their loved ones who may be struggling with alcoholism or substance misuse.

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