January 26th 2024.
Meet Amanda*, a 51-year-old personal trainer who found herself in a sexless relationship for over a decade. But after turning to Tinder, she met her partner of five years, James, and her sex life was completely transformed. Amanda now has a pretty high sex drive and loves the intimacy and pleasure she experiences with James, but she's always craving more.
Despite the challenges of balancing their schedules and responsibilities (both have two children from previous relationships and live apart), Amanda and James make time for each other and have sex an average of three times a week. As Amanda explains, "We schedule weekends together and during that time sex is the number one priority. During the week, my partner works hard and has a lot of early starts so we’ll maybe only spend one or two nights together."
But even when they're too tired for sex, Amanda and James still make time for intimacy and connection. "If we’re too tired for sex, we don’t stress, but when we’re together we’ll always be in bed by 9pm for a chat and a cuddle that often leads to more." Their relationship is a testament to the importance of making time for physical and emotional intimacy, even in the midst of busy lives.
So without further ado, here's a sneak peek into Amanda's sex diary for the week. Fair warning, it's not safe for work.
Monday:
After a fun and busy weekend with James, Amanda wakes up feeling tired. She takes her kids to school and heads to the gym for a weights class, where her mind often wanders towards thoughts of sex. "The weekend was amazing," she reflects. "Although James and I have been together for five years, we don’t live together and I think that’s what keeps things exciting."
Amanda and James met on Tinder and quickly discovered their compatibility. "At first I was worried that although the sex was good, it might be too vanilla for me," Amanda admits. "But we talked about it and he mentioned there were some things he’d like to try – so I bought him some ropes and a spanking paddle. He got the hang of it very quickly and now we’re up for anything, as long as it’s just between the two of us."
Their weekend included some new experiences, like trying nipple clamps and a collar, which Amanda unexpectedly loved. Tonight, however, she's on her own and falls asleep after catching up on her favorite show.
Tuesday:
Amanda has a bikini wax appointment today and loves the feeling of smoothness afterwards. She decides to surprise James and let him know, which always gets him excited. Despite having to wake up at 5am the next day, James suggests coming over and bringing dinner. "We love to do little things like bring each other a cup of tea in the morning and share batch cook dinners," Amanda says. "It’s a really good way to show you care, so I find it surprisingly sexy."
After dinner, they can't wait to get into bed and take advantage of some alone time. However, they both end up falling asleep before anything happens. "He starts to go down on me, but I’m not relaxed enough so we end up falling asleep," Amanda explains.
Wednesday:
They wake up at 5:30am, both feeling horny. After some cuddling and touching, they end up having sex lying side-by-side. Although Amanda doesn't have an orgasm, the morning sex gives her something to think about all day. "By lunchtime, it’s still on my mind, so when I have a spare half hour I get my vibrator out and watch porn on my phone so I can have a quick orgasm," she reveals. "Watching porn together has helped us open up about what we like and I’ve been watching it on my own for years."
Amanda explains that her sex drive tends to fluctuate, but it's usually higher when she's seeing James more often. "But when he goes away on a work trip I don’t think about it so much – except when I start looking forward to him coming home." That evening, Amanda falls asleep early, looking forward to the weekend when they'll have more time together.
Thursday:
"Thursdays are pretty much the start of the weekend for us," Amanda shares. "We have a takeaway round at mine and always end up getting a bit horny." They spend the evening in bed, watching Netflix, but James reveals that he'll be working from home the next day.
Amanda has plans for the day, but they realize they have 45 minutes in the morning before she has to leave. So, she decides to go to James' flat. "Sometimes we have to schedule things down to the minute, but we always make the effort to get together."
Friday:
Amanda is still in her gym gear when she arrives at James' flat. He's made her a cup of tea and the instant horniness kicks in. "We’re kissing and I don’t even have time to get undressed when I get on top of him," she says. They have sex in her favorite position and she finally has an orgasm after a week of not having one. "I feel completely different afterwards – so relaxed and relieved – and he gets so turned on he comes too."
Amanda also reveals that lots of things make her feel sexy and she wants sex more than she did 10 years ago. "I think it’s a combination of getting the right balance of HRT, making time for exercise and being with someone who I trust enough to ask for anything I need." After a few glasses of wine, they fall asleep early, satisfied and content.
Saturday:
They wake up late and spend the morning in bed, sipping tea and chatting. "I love this time and I feel very lucky to have it," Amanda says. "Meeting someone on Tinder at this age seemed unlikely and I think we were both looking to see who was out there, but after our first date we were surprised at how much we have in common."
Amanda credits her therapy for helping her break out of unhealthy relationship patterns and find a healthy, fulfilling relationship with James. "We’re honest about what we want, we’re happy to do things like separate holidays and we’re planning our future together."
That evening, Amanda spends time with James and his teenage son, enjoying a low-key evening of pizza and watching TV. "Not the most exciting evening, but I love it."
Sunday:
Amanda wakes up early but neither of them feel like getting out of bed, so they have slow sex instead. "We know we’ll be too busy to see each other over the next few days, so we make the most of it," she explains. "James knows I like it rough sometimes and he always senses when I’m feeling a bit kinky, so there’s some Sunday morning spanking and then I hold him down while we both climax."
Amanda is then off to do her weekly food shopping, but she doesn't mind because she knows she'll see James during the week and it'll be amazing. As she reflects on her relationship and sex life, she concludes, "We try to plan our diaries so we can spend as much time together as we can." And that's the key to keeping their sex life exciting and fulfilling – making each other a priority and making time for intimacy and pleasure.
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