Tips for managing self-absorbed family members during the holiday season.

The holiday season has arrived in Melbourne, and the streets are alive with the sights and sounds of Christmas. Decorations sparkle and lights twinkle, while cheerful songs fill the air. Many of us are excited to spend this time with loved ones, but for some, Christmas can be a less than jolly experience.

Some people dread the thought of spending the holidays without their loved ones, while others fear being surrounded by extended family and relatives. Will your cousin once again cause heated arguments at the dinner table, bullying others and refusing to see their perspective? Will your dad criticize others for their gifts and flaunt his own extravagant presents? And will your aunt steal the spotlight and make the whole event about her?

Unfortunately, these behaviors are all too common in people with narcissistic traits. Narcissistic individuals crave attention and validation, feel entitled to special treatment, lack empathy, and often manipulate and control those around them. It's no wonder that many of us with narcissistic family members dread the holiday season.

But fear not, as there are ways to navigate these interactions and take care of yourself at the same time. One option is to limit your exposure to difficult relatives by spending less time with them. If you can't avoid them entirely, have a plan in place for gracefully exiting a conversation or event if it becomes emotionally draining.

Another strategy is to set healthy boundaries. Narcissistic individuals often lack empathy and may push boundaries to get their way. So it's important to have realistic expectations and be prepared to redirect the conversation or firmly state that you don't want to talk about a certain topic.

It's also important to focus on what you can control, such as your own responses and reactions. Narcissistic individuals may become emotionally reactive and aggressive when they feel criticized or mistreated, so it's best to remain calm and uninterested in fueling their need for attention. Remember that their attacks are not personal but rather a reflection of their own need for control.

In some cases, you may even try to manipulate a narcissistic relative into showing empathy. While this is best left to trained professionals and could backfire, it's worth considering as a last resort. You could try to make empathy seem advantageous or desirable by sharing stories or facts about how it can lead to success in leadership roles.

Lastly, don't forget to prioritize your own mental and emotional wellbeing. It's okay to take breaks and step away from draining conversations or situations. Spend time doing things you enjoy and surround yourself with more understanding and supportive family members.

No matter the power dynamics at play, it's important to stay true to yourself and not let difficult family members ruin your holiday season. With these tips in mind, you can not only survive but thrive during this time of year. Happy holidays!

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