November 28th 2024.
Pennie Looker was a dedicated member of the Australian Defence Force for almost 20 years before being discharged against her will. The sudden loss of her career and identity left her feeling lost and hopeless, and she eventually attempted to end her own life. Sadly, Looker's story is not uncommon among female ex-service members. In fact, data from the Australian Institute of Health and Welfare shows that they are 107 per cent more likely to die by suicide than the general female population.
For Looker, the struggles she faced during her time in the ADF were compounded by the fact that she was involuntarily discharged on medical grounds. This made her more than five times more likely to die by suicide. Speaking to 9news.com.au, Looker shared, "I'd lost my job, my career. I'd gone from being a full-time working mum with a great career, to unemployed and unable to do anything."
Looker's journey with the ADF began when she enlisted at just 17 years old. Over the next 20 years, she experienced sexual harassment, sexual assault, and bullying. The first time she was sexually harassed, Looker reported it and was forced into mediation with the perpetrator. However, she was left feeling like she was the problem, rather than the victim. This experience made her hesitant to report a later incident of sexual assault for fear of a similar response.
Sadly, Looker's story is not unique. Other female service members shared similar experiences with her, with some even confiding that it left them suicidal. However, when Looker joined the Australian Army Psychology Corps, she was obligated to report any disclosures made to her. This created a culture of silence, as service members feared administrative discharge or restrictions if they asked for help.
The toxic culture of the ADF had a severe impact on Looker's mental health. She described feeling compartmentalized and not recognizing herself anymore. In 2014, she took leave to focus on her mental health, but instead suffered a stroke and spent weeks in the hospital. Despite not feeling ready, Looker felt pressured to return to work, and a year later, she was involuntarily medically discharged. This sudden loss of career, community, and identity was devastating for Looker and her family.
Without ADF housing, Looker and her family faced the possibility of homelessness. They were forced to rely on relatives for months, and her initial applications for support through the Department of Veterans' Affairs were rejected. This was the final straw for Looker, and she attempted to end her life.
Six years later, when the Royal Commission into Defence and Veteran Suicides began, Looker was determined to be a part of it. She made a submission and spoke as a witness, sharing her story and advocating for change. The commission's final report, released in September, included 122 recommendations to address the national crisis of military suicide. One of these recommendations was for an external, independent, expert inquiry into sexual violence in the ADF.
Looker is hopeful that these recommendations will be followed, but she knows that it will take pressure on the federal government and ADF to bring about real change. She stated, "What happened to me and what's happened to so many others is absolutely disgusting." A spokesperson for Defence shared that they are committed to ensuring individuals have access to support services and a safe environment to report abuse and sexual misconduct. However, Looker fears that without continued pressure, progress will stagnate, and more veterans will die.
In the meantime, Looker's story is being shared as part of photographer Richard Wiesel's SERVICE exhibition, which aims to shed light on the challenges faced by veterans. If you or someone you know is in need of support, please reach out to Lifeline or Beyond Blue. In the event of an emergency, do not hesitate to dial Triple Zero.
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