May 13th 2024.
As I was scrolling through my phone, I stumbled upon a video that always brings tears to my eyes. It was a clip of my son Jaiden, who was five years old at the time, finding out that he was going to be a big brother. My husband Vijay and I had just returned from our three-month scan, filled with excitement and joy. We couldn't wait to share the news with our little boy.
As soon as we told Jaiden, he couldn't contain his happiness and exclaimed "congratulations!" to us. It was a beautiful moment that we captured on video. But little did we know, our happiness would soon turn into a devastating tragedy.
My pregnancy had been completely normal and healthy, and Jaiden's excitement continued to grow as the due date approached. He even went up to the loft to retrieve his old buggy and pram for his new sibling. However, things took a turn for the worse during the last bank holiday weekend in May.
I started experiencing small contractions, but nothing too alarming. Jaiden was busy drawing a sunny picture of our family, completely unaware of the chaos that was about to unfold. By Sunday morning, the contractions were getting more frequent, so I called the local maternity unit for advice. They instructed me to carry on as normal unless the pain intensified, and even suggested eating spicy food to help induce labor.
But as the day progressed, the pain became unbearable. By 8pm, we were back at home and things were escalating quickly. I noticed blood when I went to the bathroom, and within 15 minutes, the sanitary towel was completely soaked. The pain was excruciating, and by the time we reached the hospital, I couldn't even put on my seatbelt.
The nurse examined me and informed me that I was 7cm dilated, and I was rushed down to the delivery suite in a wheelchair because I couldn't walk. The staff attempted to monitor the baby's heartbeat using a cardiotocograph, but due to my inability to sit still, the strap kept coming off. It was then that I found out a fetal scalp electrode should have been used for a more accurate reading, but unfortunately, there were none available at the time.
I remember telling my husband Vijay that the pain was unlike anything I had ever experienced before, and he knew I was serious. However, some of the midwives seemed dismissive and even rolled their eyes. But within two hours of arriving at the hospital, a registrar announced that an emergency C-section was necessary because the baby's heart rate was declining.
After being prepped for surgery, I suddenly felt a pulling sensation as they tried to deliver the baby. And then there was silence. No crying, no sound of a newborn baby. I could sense the panic in the room and saw the medical team performing compressions and counting down from three. My husband's face was filled with horror, and I knew something was terribly wrong.
It turned out that our baby boy wasn't breathing, so they had to resuscitate him. Those 30 minutes felt like an eternity as we anxiously waited for any news. Finally, a midwife came in and told us that our baby was a boy and that they had managed to resuscitate him. However, he needed to be transferred for critical neonatal care.
It was a moment of pure shock and disbelief for both of us. I went into shock and started vomiting uncontrollably. I was shaking and shivering, and even needed foil blankets to keep me warm. And as I was drifting in and out of consciousness, I caught a glimpse of our baby being wheeled out of the room and a crash team rushing in.
I lost four liters of blood from my uterus and had to be put under general anesthesia. The last thing I remember seeing was a consultant covered in my blood, wearing a visor. It was a terrifying experience that I wouldn't wish on anyone.
Four hours later, I woke up in a recovery room, still in disbelief over what had just happened. It was a traumatic birth experience that left us with a beautiful baby boy, but also with a deep sense of loss for the baby we had lost. It's a pain that I carry with me every day, and watching that video of Jaiden's excitement always brings me to tears. But I am grateful for our little miracle and will always cherish the memory of the day he became a big brother.
As I was scrolling through my phone, I stumbled upon a video that never fails to bring tears to my eyes. It captured the moment my five-year-old son, Jaiden, found out he was going to be a big brother. My husband, Vijay, and I had just returned home from our three-month scan filled with excitement and anticipation. We couldn't wait to share the news with Jaiden, who eagerly responded with a heartfelt "congratulations!" Every time I watch that video, I am reminded of the pure joy and happiness we felt as a family.
However, our joy soon turned into heartbreak as I experienced birth trauma, a tragedy that affects thousands of women in the UK every year. Despite having a completely normal and healthy pregnancy, I lost my baby boy. It was devastating. I remember how much Jaiden's excitement grew as my belly grew, he even went to the loft to retrieve his old buggy and pram for his new sibling. But on a sunny weekend in May, when Jaiden was busy drawing a picture of our family, I started experiencing small contractions.
By Sunday morning, the contractions had become more frequent and I called my local maternity unit for guidance. They advised me to continue with my day unless the pain intensified. I even indulged in a spicy Nando's meal, hoping it would help induce labor. However, by 8pm, the pain had become unbearable and I noticed blood while using the bathroom.
Within 15 minutes, the pain had intensified and I could barely sit still. We rushed to the hospital, but I couldn't even put on my seatbelt due to the excruciating pain in my back. A nurse examined me and informed me that I was 7cm dilated, so they took me to the delivery suite in a wheelchair. However, attempts to monitor the baby's heartbeat using a cardiotocograph were unsuccessful as I couldn't sit still. This was when I found out that a fetal scalp electrode should have been used for a more accurate recording, but there were none available at the time.
I remember telling my husband, Vijay, that the pain was unlike anything I had ever experienced before. He could tell I was serious, but some of the midwives seemed to roll their eyes. Within two hours of arriving at the hospital, a registrar informed me that an emergency C-section was necessary as our baby's heart rate was declining. After half an hour of preparation, I felt the pulling of my skin as they tried to deliver the baby. I felt a great pressure being relieved, but there was no sound of a crying baby. Instead, I heard compressions and counting down from three. I looked at Vijay in desperation and saw the horror on his face.
Our baby wasn't breathing, and the medical team had to resuscitate him for what felt like the longest 30 minutes of my life. Finally, a midwife told us we had a baby boy, but he needed to be transferred for critical neonatal care as he was on a ventilator. At that moment, I went into shock and started vomiting uncontrollably. I was shivering and my teeth were chattering, so they had to cover me with foil blankets. As I lay there, I saw our baby being wheeled out of the room, and then a crash team rushed in. I was losing consciousness and had to be put under general anesthesia.
The last thing I remember was seeing a consultant wearing a visor covered in my blood. I had lost four liters of blood from my uterus. Four hours later, I woke up in a recovery room, still in disbelief and shock. It was a traumatic and heartbreaking experience for our family, and it's something no one should ever have to go through.
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