May 24th 2024.
After experiencing a traumatic childhood within the Plymouth Brethren Christian Church, John Gilliland, now known as Gilli, decided to change his name as a way to distance himself from his past. He describes the church as a cult and believes that the strict rules and regulations forced upon him led to three suicide attempts.
Growing up in North Yorkshire, Gilli was born into the Plymouth Brethren Christian Church, which is a subset of the Christian evangelical movement. He claims that his childhood was filled with sexual abuse by a church member and restrictions such as not being allowed to listen to music or go on dates with women without proposing first. Despite being referred to as a cult by former members, the group denies these allegations and considers itself a mainstream Christian Church.
Due to the traumatic experiences he endured while in the PBCC, Gilli now goes by his new name and has left the religion. He met his wife while working and has since adjusted to a life outside of the strict church rules. However, he still struggles with the impact of his past and has chosen to identify as having no faith.
One of the most difficult parts for Gilli is accepting the abuse he endured as a child. It took him 10 years to come to terms with it due to the stigma attached to being a victim and he has not reported it to the police. He left the church in 2012 at the age of 24 to be with a non-church member, cutting off all contact with his family. Despite this, he has found happiness in his new life with his wife and three children.
Gilli claims that the teachings in the PBCC were based on biblical teachings, but twisted to suit the agenda of the church. For example, he was not allowed to learn about sex education in school or visit public places like cinemas and restaurants. He also faced bullying from his peers in mainstream school and was homeschooled for two years by a former teacher who was a member of the church.
At the Brethren-specific school he attended, Gilli remembers the strict rules and the staff even gluing pages of books together if they were deemed inappropriate or against the church's teachings. He also recalls his home life being extremely restrictive, with every aspect of his life controlled by the church. From what time he woke up in the morning to how much of the Bible he read in a day, there was no freedom of choice.
Despite all of this, Gilli managed to follow the rules and rarely rebelled. The most rebellious thing he can recall doing was buying a copy of the Abba Gold CD. However, he believes that the church monitored all forms of communication, including the use of mobile phones. He also claims that the church protected the abuser responsible for his sexual abuse, which is something he struggles with to this day.
Although Gilli is now happily married and has left the PBCC, he still carries the scars of his past. He hopes to raise awareness about the harmful effects of strict religious groups and the importance of speaking out against abuse. Despite the difficulties he has faced, he is grateful to have found happiness and a new sense of freedom in his life outside of the church.
Gilli, a man who goes by a different name now, has been through a lot in his life. He was born into a church that he now describes as a "cult" and has faced some serious trauma because of it. Even though he has moved on from that part of his life, the memories and experiences still haunt him.
Now 35 years old and living in North Yorkshire, Gilli was born into the Plymouth Brethren Christian Church, a subset of the Christian evangelical movement. Growing up, he was not allowed to listen to music on CDs, go to restaurants, or date women before proposing. These strict rules were enforced by the church, which some people refer to as a "cult" – although the church denies this and claims to be a "mainstream Christian Church."
Due to the traumatic experiences he endured while in the church, Gilli has chosen to go by a different name instead of his birth name, John. He associates his old name with his "past life" and has made the decision to leave it behind. He met his wife while working and left the church for her. They are now happily married with three children.
Gilli claims that while attending a Brethren specific school, the staff would glue pages of books together if they thought the content went against the church's teachings. He also believes that the church would "monitor" all communication on mobile phones. From the age of 14 to 20, Gilli says he was sexually abused by a member of the church. It took him 10 years to accept what had happened because of the "stigma" attached to it, and he has not reported it to the police.
In 2012, at the age of 24, Gilli chose to leave the church to be with a non-church member. He now has no contact with his family but has adjusted to life in the "outside world." He no longer identifies with any religion and considers himself to have no faith.
Reflecting on his upbringing, Gilli shares that every aspect of his life was controlled by the church. From the moment he woke up, he was told what to do – how much of the Bible to read, what time to be at work, and when to come home. He even had church services every day of the week. There was no freedom of choice.
Despite the strict rules, Gilli says he rarely rebelled. The most rebellious thing he ever did was buying a copy of the Abba Gold CD. He remembers being bullied by his peers for being in the church while attending a mainstream school. He also had to turn down invitations from friends to play after school because of his religion.
Looking back, Gilli believes that the teachings of the church were based on "biblical teachings but twisted to suit their own agenda." He shares that he was not allowed to learn about sex education in school and was not allowed to go to public places like cinemas or restaurants.
The most difficult part for Gilli has been the sexual abuse he faced as a teenager. He says that the abuser is still protected by the church, which is a painful reality for him. He didn't fully understand what had happened to him until years later, and even then, he didn't want to believe it because of the stigma attached to sexual abuse. He has not reported it to the police because it is a he-said-she-said situation, and he doesn't want to deal with the potential backlash.
Despite everything he has been through, Gilli has found happiness in his life. He is grateful to have left the church and is now happily married with three children. He has come a long way since his days in the "cult" and is finally able to live his life on his own terms.
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