March 11th 2024.
Published on May 27, 2015, Renee Hornbuckle had it all - a successful marriage, thriving ministry, fruitful relationships, and a lucrative business. She was seen as a shining example of success by many, with her external life seemingly in perfect order. However, life had a different plan for her and without warning, it dropped a bombshell that she was not prepared for.
Her then-husband, who was also her pastor, faced shocking allegations of narcotics possession and gross sexual misconduct. This scandal not only shattered her image of a perfect life but also brought shame, suffering, and sorrow. To make matters worse, she also experienced a spiraling loss of finances, relationships, and possessions. Renee had to make a decision - to either rise above the crisis or let it consume her.
Today, Renee serves as a crisis intervention strategist and CEO of Insight Development Strategists. Her own personal experience has given her valuable wisdom in confronting, managing, and overcoming crises. With a career spanning over 30 years in strategic management, organizational leadership, crisis intervention, and staff training, Renee has also authored several books, including Sustained and Suffering in Silence.
According to Renee, troubles never come at a convenient time. They often disrupt our lives when we least expect it. As much as we may want everything to be perfect, we must accept that there will be times of trouble and unexpected adversity. The question is, will we be ready for it?
In times of crisis and loss, Renee believes that there are three phases of experience - shock, acceptance, and adjustment. To help others navigate through these phases and recover in a healthy and functional manner, she shares a practical crisis coping list:
Firstly, it is important to focus on what truly matters. Take it one hour, day, or even moment at a time. Secondly, get enough rest and sleep as exhaustion can hinder our ability to make smart decisions. Thirdly, try to maintain a sense of normalcy, especially if you have children. Their routines should continue as much as possible. Next, remember to exercise regularly to relieve stress and tension, even if it's just a short walk. Additionally, eating a balanced diet and staying hydrated can also aid in the healing process.
It's crucial to avoid using alcohol, drugs, or other substances to mask the pain. These temporary distractions will only prolong the recovery process. Instead, seek out the right people to talk to - those who have been through similar experiences and can offer comfort, support, and guidance. Don't be afraid to consult a licensed professional or speak with a trusted counselor.
Most importantly, give yourself time and permission to heal. It's okay to have challenging days, but don't let them paralyze you. Engage in activities that you enjoy, whether it's journaling, painting, cooking, traveling, or spending time with loved ones. And don't forget to draw upon the coping skills you have used in the past to overcome other losses.
In conclusion, the recent industry alarm over layoffs at the Los Angeles Times highlights the harsh reality of journalism in crisis. But let's also remember that crisis can strike anyone at any time. It's how we handle and overcome these challenges that truly define our strength and resilience.
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