Don't judge mums for taking time off for themselves; it's important for all of them.

Blue skies and silence...bliss.
I used to love travelling before I had my baby - with my husband, friends, and even solo. I knew life would change once I became a mum, but I had no intention of giving up my love of travel.

However, after I had a baby, I started to feel anxious about going away without him. It wasn't because I didn't want to travel, it was because I felt guilty for wanting or needing a break. I even worried about all the things that could go wrong while I wasn't around to help.

I finally decided to take a leap of faith and go away for a long weekend to Tenerife with two friends when my son was just over a year old. I was hoping to get some winter sun and some much-needed relaxation. Unfortunately, I got some judgement for my decision. People seemed to think it was selfish of me to go away and leave my son, and that I should be going on a family holiday instead.

I'm not the only mum who has faced this kind of criticism. Clinical psychologist Dr Charlotte Russell explains that while there are lots of benefits to family holidays, they aren't always the most relaxing for mums. We're often so focused on our children's needs that it can become exhausting. Taking a break without our children means being able to focus on our own needs, which can be incredibly beneficial for our wellbeing.

Not everything goes to plan, though. When I was sipping sangria on my trip, I got some bad news from home that my husband and son had both gone down with a sickness bug. I felt guilty for being away and worried that I would be judged for not being there to help.

But as Dr Charlotte explains, it's not helpful to stress about things that might happen. Yes, it's possible that our family might fall ill while we're away, but if they're otherwise healthy, they'll be just fine. We shouldn't let our fears get in the way of doing something that's right for us.

My trip helped me realise that despite the negativity I'd faced, I did come back feeling refreshed and like my old pre-baby self. I decided that I wasn't going to let other people tell me how to spend my time, with or without my child. So I booked another break, this time heading to Lanzarote with a mum friend.

It was absolute bliss - good food, good wine, good company, and no sticky fingers or tantrums. I came back feeling revived.

If you're keen to travel without your kids but feel worried, Dr Charlotte has this advice: You know your family best, so it's up to you to decide what's right. Travel might not be important for some mums, but for others it's a big part of their identity and provides a sense of meaning. If you know your children are safe and you think a trip would leave you feeling connected to yourself and refreshed, then go for it.

I'm so glad I did. Long live the momcation!

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