July 24th 2024.
It takes an incredible amount of bravery to speak out about personal experiences, and Zara McDermott and Amanda Abbington have shown just that. As someone who has also kept quiet for years, I can truly understand the courage it takes to come forward and share your story.
The director-general of the BBC, Tim Davie, recently made a statement regarding the ongoing controversy surrounding Strictly Come Dancing. He mentioned the importance of competitiveness, but stressed that there are limits and a line that should never be crossed. This statement comes after several former contestants have come forward about the behavior of some professionals in the rehearsal room.
Although many fans were surprised by these revelations, I was not. In fact, as I read each article and statement, the situations being described sadly felt all too familiar. Having been in the intense environment of dance training, I know from personal experience how unpleasant it can be.
As a member of a prestigious dance troupe in London at just 17 years old, I was dedicated to my craft. I had been dancing since the age of two and was determined to have a career in musical theatre. I would wake up at 4am every Saturday and travel from my home in Suffolk to train in the capital, often not returning until 11pm. I sacrificed my free time, missing out on social events and even using my free periods at school to rehearse. To me, it was all worth it to achieve my dream.
However, what I soon realized was not a dream, but a nightmare. In one rehearsal, I was publicly humiliated and told that I wasn't good enough to be a part of the group. As a naive teenager, I believed that being a member of this troupe was my only chance at a successful career. The pressure was immense and I even let my school work suffer in favor of more rehearsal time. When my results weren't as good as expected, I felt like my back-up plan was out the window, pushing me to work even harder.
I was made to believe that without this group, I would be nothing. They had connections all over the industry and I was convinced that one word from them could ruin my chances of ever pursuing my passion. When I heard Amanda Abbington's account of her time on Strictly, it felt like I was transported back to being 17. The constant put-downs and fear of being singled out finally took its toll and I suffered a nervous breakdown. It was then that my mother stepped in and decided enough was enough. She pulled me out of the troupe, much to my horror. I felt like I was throwing away my entire future.
But looking back, it was the best decision she could have made. I went back to my old dance teacher who helped me rebuild my confidence and I eventually earned my degree in musical theatre. However, the toll this experience took on my mental health was immense. I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder in my second year of college.
Every day was a struggle, but I was determined to push through. I had sacrificed so much to get to where I was and I didn't want to admit to myself that maybe this wasn't what I wanted anymore. By my final year, I had come to the realization that my mental health was more important and that my childhood dreams no longer aligned with the person I had become.
Shirley Ballas once said that she had to be "resilient and bulletproof" to make it in the industry. While I understand this in terms of auditions and disappointments, I can't help but feel that something needs to change. And that's why I admire the bravery of Zara McDermott and Amanda Abbington for speaking out. I kept quiet for years, but I hope that their courage will lead to change in the industry.
Some may defend this type of teaching as "traditional", whether it's in school or in the Strictly rehearsal room. But some traditions need to be broken. I fell in love with dance because it was a way for me to express myself when words couldn't. If we all stay silent, this behavior will continue and that is simply unacceptable.
I hope that as Strictly addresses these allegations and takes steps to protect its dancers, other studios and educational institutions will follow suit. It's time for this wonderful art form to become a safe space for all those who love it. Do you have a story to share? Please reach out and let's continue this important conversation.
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